pantoum's Diaryland
Diary
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SWEET
319.
I decided that, instead of isolating, I want to do some casual dating to remind myself that Pottergrrrl is not the only fish in the sea. So, a few minutes ago, I posted a really awesome match.com ad and also posted a portion of it at craigslist: Academic female artist seeks smart passionate quirky femme to laugh and cry and gasp and discover the world with me. I take care of myself, know who I am and what I want, have a quick and far-reaching mind that finds everything from welding to string theory fascinating. I love discovering new things, discussing the possibilities and complexities of our landscape with another smart woman. I�m honest, have integrity, don�t beat around the bush. I believe in love and commitment but am selective and need my own space. Yeah my heart�s been broken just like the rest of ours; I still believe she�s out there though�that sensitive driven tender brilliant stubborn gentle kind powerful passionate beautiful woman who believes in words and art and finds as much beauty in the world as I do. Forthright eyes, unexpected kindnesses, and funny little gestures completely disarm me and, try as I might, I can�t keep a straight face if you amuse me. (Please do.) Many things make me happy: walking in rain, decaf in hand and a million ideas percolating; making music; getting knocked over by an unexpectedly strong wave; birds; tight first drafts; finishing a poem and discovering that I like it; affixing rusty elements to canvasses; painting; discovering new thinkers and staying up late because I can�t quit reading their words; a child�s irrepressible giggles; meeting each other and connecting right away and trusting that connection enough to explore it; conversation so good that we lose all track of time; feeling your electric presence on a blanket beside me as we gaze up at the sky looking for Cassiopeia; sleepy eyelash kisses; wide-awake full-tilt passion; honesty. I'm a mix of Cherokee, Scottish, Spanish and German�a tall dark and handsome woman you'd notice at a party. Men: don't waste my time or yours.
� Then I surfed the Web. Sipped my latte. Peed. Then I logged onto Yahoo and found a message from someone who read my ad. She wrote: Your ad on craigslist was beautiful. I especially love your description of things you enjoy. Right now I am not looking for a relationship�I am still in that curious phase where women turn me on but I am nervous about pursing it and keeping it quiet. I just wanted to let you know that I think your ad is exceptional.
I�m going to write back a supportive e-mail�been there (but not since I was a teenager). And denying who you really are is an awful way to live your life. � Okay. I have been sitting on my ass in this coffeehaus long enough. Gotta get moving.
5:44 p.m. - 2006-4-6
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