pantoum's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

JUSTICE IN THE WORLD?

(No. 263 � Wednesday � 10.12.2005) Pat, the Pakistani receptionist at work, married an asshole of a misogynistic American husband who belittled her for years until she finally left him last year. She works two jobs, but still can�t afford to actually divorce the jerk, so they remain separated while she lives in a trailer with her teenage daughter and, sometimes, her equally misogynistic teenage son.

Pat�s estranged husband tells her and their daughter that they are nothing because they are women. He gives money to his son, but won�t give any to his estranged wife or daughter, whose lives are very difficult and the daughter cried for days and days because there was no money for a prom dress.

Pat survived a bout of breast cancer a few years ago but her sister, mother, and father all succumbed to their cancers (environmental causes? hmmm.). This woman works her ass off and has seen some hard times, is one of who knows how many American citizens who just can�t make ends meet despite working two jobs.

Well, Patricia arrived home after finishing her second job last night to discover ambulances in her driveway and learned, to her horror, that her teenage daughter had attempted to end her life with an overdose.

�

A local man who had been caring for his bedridden wife (who had Alzheimers) and handicapped daughter (who had Down syndrome) reached the point where he could no longer take care of them, so he shot them in the head as they slept, then sat down in his chair in his living room and took his own life vvia the same method.

(One guess how many nightmares I had about that scene last night.)

Pat works two jobs and can�t make a living wage. Her daughter can�t imagine a life worth living and she's not even grown yet. A man who cared for his family for sixty years could no longer get basic services for them even as his own health declined. And the woman who cleans my office tells me that she doesn�t see how she can possibly afford to buy her daughter holiday presents this year because of projected increases in heating costs (not to mention the fact that state employees have STILL not gotten more than a pittance in raises for years as the cost-of-living continues to rise and our health insurance is continually cut, and larger co-payments and deductibles are introduced, and parking rates go up�and all that will also make her budget tighter this year.

Yet our government continues to slash social safety net programs in an effort to give even bigger tax breaks to corporate cronies and to the very rick. When will we say enough giving precedence to private financial gain at the cost of human lives?

Meanwhile, my baby brother has informed me that my other brother�s wife left him and took their three kids with her to an undisclosed location. Depending on who you believe�and I believe her because I�ve seen how violent he is when he drinks�he either has or has not started drinking again and either did or did not beat her up in front of their children.

(The judge believed her.)

This is my brother who could never be bothered to come up with a good lie when he did something wrong. He wrecked at least fifteen cars as a teenager and every single time just said �somebody ran me off the road� as he shrugged his shoulders.

He got busted for pot more than once and said, every time, that someone hid it in his clothes. He got several DWIs and, each time, said someone spiked his drink. And, each time, my parents chose to believe him.

And, for some reason, my father gave him a goddamn motorcycle after he failed all of his classes using the so-called reasoning that "he�s a boy and needs to impress girls, which will increase his self confidence which will increase his grades" (Go figure) and so it�s no surprise that he�s now telling my mother that he hasn�t had a drink since our brother�s wedding in August, that his wife �beat herself up� (yeah, right) so she could get custody of their kids, that they lost their house because his wife forgot to pay one mortgage payment on time�this works for someone who has mostly never handled bills�that he is facing a felony charge (dunno what for yet) because his wife failed to pay a fine for a misdemeanor charge�I don�t think it works that way, mom�that his wife�whom no one can find�emptied out his bank account and wallet and took the $2,000 my aunt sent to help buy my mother a car. (Pay it back. Fucker.)

Now the disappearance of $2K makes me think that he is (or possibly they are, since they are definitely both users) doing more than drinking or smoking pot�especially because they were evicted from their house. I�m wondering about crystal meth, wondering just what he�s gotten himself into and where all that money has gone. And I think we need to tell him and his wife that the money was not theirs and that, unless it is returned to my mother, we will be pressing charges.

I think his wife will be okay even if she did get beat up�I adore her and have more nightmares than I'd ever share here about my brother's fist connecting with her beautiful face�and, frankly, I'm glad she left him if he really did beat her up (for at least the second time since I threw my body into the fray to stop the one other time I witnessed this).

I worry he won�t see any reason to live now that he's not coming home to his children, his family. But I know my brother and his foibles and I�m even more worried that my mother will let him move in with her and told her that she needs to make damn sure CeeCee is never alone with my brother if this happens.

I�m not surprised that my family produced a violent son, really�don't know how any of us are functioning when it comes down to the play-by-play�but it makes me very sad to think about his marriage ending and our possibly never seeing his wife or children again.

In other news�because boy do we need some good news�to celebrate the fact that yesterday was National Coming Out Day, someone at UNC threw a chocolate cream pie into the face of Patrick Guerriero, head of the gay Log Cabin Republicans, when he was speaking there last night. Hee!

And I am happy to report that I have accepted another rush job from my favorite local publisher, who tells me there�s more where this came from. I�m thrilled because I need some extra cash in order to buy my mom a car.

7:44 p.m. - 2005-10-12

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next